i fancy your fancy.

some new method of staying neutral
fists full of shirtsleeve, toothpick clenched in teeth
legs crossed and jumping, arms folded, hugging myself
hat pulled low, eyes squinting at the floor

reading and re-reading brochures and business cards all day
laughing away the blurred vision
visiting all the same songs each night
playing tetris in my head rather than thinking of you

pasting together what i can remember from the list
something about japan, a phrase about bread
anything to keep your voice loud and here
keep the battle raging calmly

and my nerves make eating a chore
but anxiety is cheaper than food

---------------------

all eyes trained on me FOCUS remind me of your regard the hint of a promise of trust keeps me pacing and setting scenes in my head WHA...?

you know how sometimes your eyelids will kinda HURT when it's time to go to sleep? that's happening right now. i feel so so so rad right now, it's amazing. i cleaned up my bike (after months of riding through the most bulljazzy conditions possible) and played cards in the park and didn't eat any doughnuts or anything too weird. listened to xiu xiu and did laundry and and and YEAH.

and J-WARY'S A YEAR OLDER!! cock-ass. all my best, j-wary. maybe i'll make you a cake tomorrow.